Warning: He’s Getting Out of Prison Soon

As I always say, “locking up the behavior doesn’t solve anything because one day they will be free”.

It’s important to treat the “root causes” of the inmate’s behavior, not put a band-aid on it or think metal bars will solve the problem for the long-term.

Some people (like the guy below) may never be helped enough to guarantee he would no longer kill, but had his behaviors been acknowledged / treated when he was a kid or teen, or anytime before his spree… maybe?

It’s important to note that many sociopathic / psychopathic tendencies and indicators ARE seen in children as young as 3 years old, yet many mental health professionals are “scared” to diagnose anyone under age 18. In fact and sadly to society’s detriment, many mental health professionals blow it off as “normal childhood behavior”.

I disagree with that reasoning.

Most aware parents know when it’s normal or not-normal behavior (moms can usually sense it sooner), yet when parents do seek help, the professionals dismiss them as being “over-emotional” or “too-close to be objective”.

I also disagree that many psychologists will label and diagnose someone with an Axis I disorder (ie: bipolar, major depressive) because there are essentially no cures for Axis II disorders (esp. Cluster B – ie: histrionic, borderline).

The reasons this is done vary to include those with Axis I being more accepted within society because of its common prevalence. In addition, Axis I peeps also qualify for other treatments and services, including SSI.

Many treatment professionals and psychologists will not accept people diagnosed with Axis II because they can be extremely-exhausting to work with. Again, Axis II indicators are prevalent in childhood.

There are three Axis II clusters (A: such as paranoid / schizoid who experience major disruptions in relationships because their behavior may be perceived as peculiar, suspicious, or detached) and (B: such as mentioned above, who experience very intense emotions or engage in extremely impulsive, theatrical, promiscuous, or law-breaking behaviors) and (C: such as avoidant, dependent, and ocd).

OH & FYI – did you know that an average of 40% of patients who should be diagnosed as Bipolar are actually MISdiagnosed first (most often with major depressive disorder instead) and it then takes an average of 10 YEARS before they are correctly diagnosed with bipolar?

During these 10 years inappropriate use of anti-depressants has actually been worsening symptoms!

ANYWAY… that’s a long way of warning you…

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Wondering if someone has a mental illness?

DO THIS & find out !

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Post by Ms. Mozelle Martin

 

Is Our Society Doomed?

To avoid my 1st Amendment rights being squashed again on Facebook, I figured I’d jump over here to WordPress and hope that it stays. You see, just yesterday someone “flagged” several of my posts on Facebook as being “inappropriate”. I call them REAL LIFE. But, instead of getting irritated, I said, “That’s okay. Let me sum them ALL up for you….”, so I did.

That summary is below

I am often beyond saddened & disgusted over the state of our society, here in the USA and across the world. Many could argue that the cruel, insensitive, unkind, murderous, savage-minded people deserve what they have coming to them (karma?), however most people I know would agree that animals really never deserve the way they are treated. Is it just me or does China lead the world in cruelty to animals and people? Or is are all Asian countries ruthlessly heartless?

To my sensitive readers… this post is 100% MY personal opinion. If you don’t like it, don’t bother to comment because I really don’t care if you like my opinions or not. Bottom line is that I may have a lot of people remove themselves from my friends list, and that’s OK too. It’s one way to see who my true friends are, lol.

On the other hand, I may gain more followers since I am often told by others, “Wow, you have the courage to actually speak what I only think yet am too afraid to actually say”.

Whether you stay or go, if you don’t know why I have a strong opinion on these types of topics, you obviously don’t know me very well at all, so let me enlighten you in a nutshell…

Although I have forgiven everyone in my past, and haven’t been “triggered” in decades, that does not mean that I did not experience decades of trauma starting at birth (adoption), or that I was bullied so badly as a kid and had my first serious suicide attempt at age 9. Or that, when I was 11, I was almost gang raped and tied naked to a tombstone overnight. Then, throughout my childhood and teen years, I was abused in pretty much every way from those closest to me as well as peers, and sooo much more. 

Then, as a young adult, I escaped a very abusive marriage, out-smarted a hired gun, and raised my two kids alone while running from a 10-year stalker who was also a convicted child predator. This predator also posed as a cop and followed me & my kids to several states.

Even with two Master’s degrees and a doctorate, I was then reverse-discriminated against and completely blackballed from working in mainstream mental health throughout Maricopa County where I live because (quote), “Your ethics are just too strong” (WHAT?!). Plus people who interview me usually have much less education and experience and one has even told me that she wouldn’t hire me because I should be her supervisor. Apparently brains intimidate many people! I could go on and on about that, and bring forth others treated the exact same way by the exact same agencies but that serves no purpose than to chain myself to the past.

steve jobs quote

On the flipside, I always preferred paramilitary settings and despite the black-balling in the mental health “gen pop”, I was able to consistently work in jails and prisons as a Forensic Mental Health Professional and currently work in a maximum security men’s prison. So, as an international forensic handwriting and body language expert, I have spent over 30 years total in the forensics and criminology fields.

Although I was not a “people person” per se, I have always felt absolute empathy for anyone who has experienced any kind of trauma as a child or adult. That’s why I have been passionate for my entire life about helping others heal and find light in their darkest moments. Of course, I can’t take all the credit – I had enormous assistance from God, the individual’s own spirituality, and my Clinical Graphology program.

Yet during my 30+ years in forensics, I also experienced and saw things that most of the public has only seen on TV or in movies. In other words, I have seen the RAW TRUTH of the unbelievable, pure unimaginable and beyond-incomprehensible things people have done – and continue to do – to animals and each other. Often this is done so in the name of ego, politics, greed, religion, money, “bad genes”, and just plain selfishness.

I also feel that a LOT of the problems in our world started with music that is full of disrespectful (& often gruesome) lyrics, violent video games, drugs, the wimpy schools who look the other way when those who are bullied seek help, the mental health system full of coddling social workers who allow the mentally ill person to blame everyone else for their unhappiness (I am talking about those who abuse the systems, not those who truly seek help), and other “community” programs who allow people to be enabled by disability / food stamps / unemployment. ADD TO THAT… the DUMMYING DOWN (allowing kids with a 4th grade reading level to graduate!) in public schools (Carlos Mencia has it 100% correct), and the criminal justice system who often slaps people on the wrists without ever truly holding them accountable. ADD TO THAT…those professionals we were once able to trust – like that of police, teachers, clergy – who are now raping our youth, beating their spouse, and in other ways hiding behind the badge. This makes it difficult for GOOD, ETHICAL professionals to survive (could this be related to the once-again, recent upswing in law enforcement officer suicides?).

ADD TO THAT… the parents who have stopped parenting as soon as kids threatened to call “child protective services” whenever they did try to parent… and then those seeming “deaf, dumb and blind” parents / grandparents who truly believe “my kid would never do that”

ADD TO THAT… Netflix is starting to remove Christian movies, and cater to what others call “anti-christian” movies, and that may be the exact thing that led to the creation of Pureflix. Who knows…

ADD TO THAT… we seem to be regressing back into the “racial segregation”, yet we are all of mixed ethnicities and every female alive has African DNA (which means so does everyone else since a woman gave birth to them). ADD TO THAT… people can no longer look inside of their pants and tell what gender they are, and ADD TO THAT… the recent upswing of Christian villagers who are being killed and their Churches and Bibles destroyed.

ADD TO THAT… a selfish younger generation who often seem to have ZERO ethics, integrity, or respect for older generations or authority. ADD TO THAT… customer service where I rarely get quality service anywhere, meaning that most food is not the way I ordered, representatives on the phone and in person are rude, etc…. and ADD TO THAT… the fact that when KIDS / TEENS kill animals they are “future serial killers”, yet when ADULTS kill animals, they are “sportsmen”. Yes, I too am a sometimes meat-eater and I struggle with this a lot (so to help, I thank the animals during prayer for giving its life to help sustain mine). I understand the “over-population” of wild animals, but we can end an animal’s life humanely, and that is largely not being done!!

ADD TO THAT… sports professionals (ie: NFL) get paid ridiculous amounts of money to throw balls around and run across fake grass, while people literally living down the street from them are starving to death. I feel sports are just one of the many distractions to keep us all “ignorant”. ADD TO THAT… that we are all victims in some way of “repression” (use of force to subdue something or someone), “oppression” (a prolonged period of maltreatment), and “suppression” (putting a stop to something like standing up and speaking about these things).

Anyway… admittedly, none of us are perfect but as you know… THE LIST GOES ON & ON

And YES, I know much of this cruelty occurred since the beginning of time and has only been outed by the internet, news, and social media.

However I’m glad they are…

People used to say to me, “I don’t understand why you don’t trust people”.

So I am glad that the truth is finally out here and in our faces. Because hiding behind all “fluffy” posts is not real, it’s not genuine. So, I vote for NO MORE blind ignorance because ignorance is not bliss. Ignorance allows the things we hate to continue.

It is anger, irritation, and frustration combined with passion that create change.

So, is it really so difficult to see why I feel so passionately about these things?

I’ve always considered myself very apolitical but now, after rereading this I’m beginning to think I should run for politics, lol. Then again, because of my satirical and often blunt comments, and strong personality, I’d probably be killed by my opponent or POTUS, lol.

Finally, as for Facebook – I hate it and always have. If I could figure out viable options (and I have tried several times) other than Facebook for the only 2 reasons I am on there, I would not be on there at all.  So until Facebook is wiped out like MySpace was (which I hope is very soon!), I’m stuck there.

hatred fear love

NOW READ THIS

Here is something I found online that someone I do not know shared on July 11th… 

In your opinion, do comments like this help or hurt society? Are they true or offensive? Are we losing control as a society? I’d really like to know your thoughts. 

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Post by Ms. Mozelle Martin

 

Reunification Therapy: Hope or Hell?

Some mental health professionals claim Reunification Therapy provides hope to family members, while other mental health professionals claim it creates hell for the child and sometimes even the custodial parent.

In addition, some mental health professionals claim Reunification Therapy is not real therapy, while family courts tend to be strong advocates for it.

In this episode, Mozelle Martin interviews Kelly Townsend, owner of Lien & Bond Investigations in the Phoenix, Arizona area and Dana Hoffman, a Cyber Intelligence Researcher who lives in Idaho. Together they discuss a current case they are working on, and how the process of rebuilding can provide hope to the family… or not.

We will also discuss the roles courts may play in putting children at more risk for revictimization.

What do YOU think? Does Reunification Therapy offer victims hope or does it sentence them to hell-in-the-home?

Click “play” to listen to the episode…

reunification

 

*** RESOURCES *** 

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Post by Ms. Mozelle Martin

Whose Birth Certificate Says “Other”?

This morning I was reading a post that discussed gender identity. Last week I was filling out a government form that asked my gender. My choices were “male”, “female”, and “other”.

I guess I’m concerned and a bit confused…

Since 99.93% of humans have XX or XY chromosomes, I highly doubt anyone’s birth certificate says the baby’s gender is “other”. So, when did members of society stop being able to look into their own underwear and see their gender? Don’t want to look? Feel!

Either way, how can someone NOT know their gender?

I do understand identifying with a gender different than one’s own. For example, I was born a female but I’ve always been a “Tomboy” — I liked to play rough, I liked to play in the mud, and I’ve never been a giggly, pouty-lip-photos, baby-talk, dress-up, tons of make-up, over-emotional girl / woman. I have spent 30 years in a male-dominated, paramilitary, forensic field as well and for my entire life, 99% of my friends have been men. BUT I still know my gender is female and I’ve never questioned or doubted that.

In addition, many men are heterosexual yet still very feminine. Cool, rock your genuine self. But our genuine selves were born male or female; we were not born other. Now we are told that referring to someone as “it” is disrespectful but you can use “they”. From a mental health standpoint, unless someone has a multiple personality disorder, they are not a “they”.

Yes, I do understand how both men and women have been forced into gender roles… women stay “barefoot & pregnant” while men “bring home the bacon”. We also tend to live in a “blame the victim” (usually women) society… such as “oh she was raped? well look what she was wearing”, or “she should not have led him on or been walking in that area alone at night”. I also feel this is complete and ignorant bullshit.

BUT… like many other historical facts, these things were accepted by society back then and – even as sad, maddening, or disgusting one may feel about them – they were (and many still are) signs of the times.

We do not force change by succumbing to it. We do force change by not allowing ourselves to be society’s victims, not by making society more stupid than it already is and then rewarding the stupidity!

Why not stop wearing dresses and high heels if we don’t want to? Why not stop wearing make-up if we don’t want to? Why not stop fixing things around the house if we don’t want to? Stop becoming parents if you don’t want kids.

In other words, accept your gender, but stop giving in to the role-expectations of society

What if our many historical figures such as Martin Luther Kingor Mother Teresa tried to say they did not know if they were “male” or “female” or they gave in instead of being driven by passion? I seriously doubt anyone’s passion is to fall into gender roles and expectations… so simply stop doing it.

In other words, resist society’s ignorance but stay true to who you were born to be.

Yes, things change.. but science has not (much)!

As someone who has worked in the forensic mental health industry for over 30 years, according to the American Psychiatric Association, in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM), *thinking* one is a gender other than what they were born as is known as “Gender Identity Disorder” (GID) — ICD-10 code # F64. When society forces GID into widespread acceptance, it is the same as promoting sociopathy (note both are “soci”).

This is not my opinion… this is SCIENTIFIC FACT.

Another scientific fact is that BRAINS are not fully developed until approximately age 26–27. So why are parents allowing their 8 or 10 year old child to say they are “bisexual” when these kids can barely wipe their own ass and probably can’t even spell the LBGQ…. words? They cannot vote, smoke, drink, or do anything else legally. They can’t budget, pay rent, or drive a car BUT somehow in a VERY immature and UNDER-developed mind, they can identify with something other than “male” or “female”?

I do NOT care where someone sticks their body parts (unless it’s illegal or someone is forcibly harmed) but schools and society are messed-up enough. Home should be full of safety and security — one that promotes a HEALTHY identity in the child(ren). I do not feel this is being done. We screwed up society decades ago when it became pretty much “illegal” to discipline our children. Parents stopped parenting and video games became caregivers. That’s when children / teens stopped having respect for well… anyone & everyone.

Now we name our kids things like “Atom Bomb”, and “Home Run”… and have allowed the birthing of a selfish generation that doesn’t want to do anything except accept handouts. We older generations were taught strong work ethic, respect, and how to think… most of those individuals in our “millennial” generation (especially those born after 1992) decide they will go to work when or if they want to, are overly-selfish, and can’t think their way out of a paper box without someone holding their hand. Schools have lowered their standards and sooooo much more.

When did society STOP giving a shit about how our short-term allowances cause often-severe long-term problems?

Facebook, which I loathe and have since day # 1, allows human trafficking groups from Russia, pornography groups from the U.K., animal abuse groups and posts from China, and a bunch of other illegal and disgusting pages BUT try to post a scientific fact such as the one I posted this morning (below), and it “violates their TOS”.

REALLY?

(I had to accept it or be locked out and put in “facebook jail” for 3 days. However, I did contact them with my real thoughts on this)

1st amendment

We have collectively created a whiny, wimpy society who proactively and aggressively seeks out shit to be offended about. Then they continue to whine because nobody understands them, all while making bullshit excuses for their unhappiness as they blame others. 

What happened to “Life is tough – suck it up buttercup?” or “Pick your battles and move on”? Worked for millions of us before now!

I’m definitely not saying society was perfect in any of the decades or generations before us, nor will it ever be. However, those of us over 40 years old likely remember when logic, intelligence, integrity, and science was sought-after in job applicants and employees. After all, medical and technological advances are just some of the things we gained from smart people!

Today, the intelligent hard workers get passed over for jobs because they intimidate someone. People ask for honesty, then call you an asshole when you are honest. The criminal justice system is trying to hire a bunch of social workers to cuddle and hold hands with convicts (I have worked in prisons and jails for decades and still do, and this does not typically work!), and now social media posts containing scientific facts violate terms of service.

We readers over age 40 also remember when we respected the elderly, our parents, and authority figures even if we disagreed with them.

What’s next? We shall see.  

Again, I’m concerned and somewhat confused about the world we live in. If it continues, will we swallow ourselves whole?

Maybe we should… sure seems like our world could use a major cleansing!

NOW READ THIS

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Post by Ms. Mozelle Martin

Disconnecting from Toxic Family Members

A common goal of my clients at the beginning of every new year is “Disconnecting from Toxic Family Members”.

Here is my advice for them:

TOXIC PEOPLE ARE NOT FIXABLE SO DON’T TRY. The way toxic people act is because of an internal struggle they bear inside of themselves but is taken out on those around them, or their target.

It is not your place to “fix” them, and they often have no idea why they feel the way they do, do the things they do, and hurt the people they hurt. Yet, they continue to do it; this in no way makes what they do justifiable.

There are also those toxic people with personality disorders who understand what their heinous words and actions do to others, but find their behavior defensible. Of course, it never really is, but in their minds they will always find a way to justify the means.

Toxic individuals are aware of the chaos they create around them. Some do so intentionally, others may be good people who do not know how to exist in the world without forcing others (you) to compromise their (your) happiness to their infliction.

Toxic people create drama and live in a world of negativity. They are essentially addicted to the drama – the negativity – the toxicity. When life is calm, it is disorienting so it doesn’t last long. Creating an argument, or turning a tiny issue into a huge verbal battle, is sure to bring their unhappy world and mindset right back. SO, take a hard look and decide for yourself if you can tolerate their behavior for a lifetime – because it will likely never go away… OR if its time to make your own well-being a priority.

This may mean that you distance yourself from this person by spending less time with them, not sharing personal information, or disconnecting entirely – temporarily or permanently.

YOU HAVE A RIGHT TO CREATE A HEALTHY (& HAPPY) LIFE FOR YOURSELF and there will come a time when you say, “enough is enough.” You are a person who deserves to be treated with love and respect. You cannot possibly grow if the sunshine is always being snuffed out by a raging storm.

You will not love yourself or live a positive, flourishing life – a life you absolutely deserve – in the wake of a toxic person who purposefully hurts you and keeps you from true happiness.

TAKE A LOOK AT WHAT YOU ALLOW: these toxic individuals often manipulate, lie, are passive-aggressive, hurtful, or physically abusive, yet continue to act this way because you allow it in your life.

What are you doing to stand up for yourself and to stop the way they treat you? How do you react when they disrespect and hurt you? What is the toxic person’s reaction when you choose to stand up to them? When you confront a toxic person, do not expect it to go smoothly. 

Because they often take your distance as a personal attack, an insult if you will, or rejection, you will often see manipulation at it’s finest. A family member will often play the victim and try to corral other family members against you because they feel you have hurt them. They may use their emotions to influence other family members and isolate you, and they may treat you harshly in return. It is common to expect lies, victim stories with you being the “bad guy”.

Toxic people will often flat out lie about what you have gone through and why you are disconnecting from them. They will usually make up new stories to disarm your interpretation of the truth and will seek to redirect the indictments they feel you are accusing them of. Again, to make them appear to be the victim.

The things the toxic person says, what those around her will say to you and accuse you of may make you feel like the crazy person. Know that the redirection is just another manipulation to make you question the validity of your claims, recollection of your account of events, and even question your own emotions. You may even feel that you are crazy, overreacting, or dramatic.

Do not question yourself. You have every right to stand up for your well-being, for your emotions, and for your sanity. It does not matter if it’s a family member or a friend, you do not have to tolerate toxic behavior when it affects your well being.

NO KIND OF ABUSE IS EVER TOLERABLE. Anyone who physically hurts another is likely breaking the law and there are consequences for their actions. If someone if emotionally manipulating, bullying and abusing you, know that you deserve better and that it’s OK to let go and walk away – whether from your parents, siblings, adult children, or another family member

No amount of love, forgiveness, guilt, grief or prayer will fix a person who is broken and purposefully hurting another (you) because of the rush they get from inflicting chaos and pain. The person you need to save is yourself.

Practicing self-love and self-care every day will feel like a new concept, but over time, you week see and feel it was the right step towards a new and fulfilling life.

The time it takes to heal from walking away from a toxic person may be swift but other times, it can take years and cycles of anger, grief, sadness, relief and finally contentment. The human mind likes to know “why” but trying to find the ‘why’ to the actions of a toxic person is usually a fruitless journey. It is one you will inevitably try to figure out for yourself, but in order to let go, you must be okay in likely never knowing those answers. Don’t give your personal power to trying to figure it out, that only serves to prevent the healing of your “scars”.

They have no justification for the way they are and the things they do and cope with the fact you aren’t like them. Are you prepared to let go – temporarily or permanently – and are you prepared for the fallout from potentially other family members or friends? How do you know when to walk away from family? Are you ready to start letting go of family?

Will you be able to continue to remind yourself that YOU are valuable when you are cycling through the stages of letting go? When you feel like giving in and picking up (or answering) your phone, can you be strong enough to know that the journey is long and hard, and each time you want to give in, it WILL get easier?

The way you feel is important and, if this is the journey you choose to take and in all the loneliness and heartbreak of it, know that you are not alone – there is support. More importantly, there are so many people like you who have chosen to be incredibly brave and embark on the path of their own happiness, just like you.

TOP 7 REASONS PEOPLE TERMINATE RELATIONSHIPS WITH FAMILY MEMBERS:

1). When the relationship is based in any kind of abuse, mentally, physically, sexually, verbally or emotionally. When the relationship is based in manipulation, overt or covert, you can be sure you are being used and abused. When you are living in constant anxiety never knowing or being able to predict how any engagement is going to turn out, it is time to love yourself enough to let go.

2). When the only contact you have with them is negative. The contact you have with them serves to bring you down, put you down and/or make you feel you are not good enough, or you haven’t done enough for them.

3). When the relationship creates so much stress that it affects the important areas of your life at work, home or both. When your emotions are totally caught up in defending yourself and wanting to explain yourself, and the chaos of your relationships with these people is all you talk about, it is time to let go.

4). If you find yourself trying to right the wrong’s (gossip they told about you), and you are constantly being ostracized to the point you lose sleep over it, you have been poisoned with their toxicity. Gossip only serves one family member, the one telling it. Yet you can be left feeling defenseless against the false beliefs about yourself. There is usually a ring leader gathering the troops for the assault and because they are joined together, you begin to wonder whether it is you who has or is the problem.

5). When the relationship is completely all about the other person and there is no real reason why the other person cannot make any effort toward the health and maintenance of the relationship with you. One sided relationships are set up for your failure. When you realize there is never going to be an “enough” place for you to reach in the relationship, you need to let go and start to focus on your own healing. Remember you should never be more invested in someone’s life than they are.

6). When and whether the relationship is only about borrowing, or needing money.

7). When crazy-making, no-win games dominate the relationship (ie: silent treatment, blame-games, no-win arguments that spin around on you), there is no point in continuing in this battle. Verbal warfare is never the place you will convince them of anything and these kinds of verbal interactions are set up to be their way or the highway.

One CLASSIC sign of a conversation or piece of advice going nowhere is when your well-intended help is met with “Yeah, but…”. 

10 SIGNS YOU HAVE A TOXIC FAMILY MEMBER:

1). You Feel Sad And Down Around Them

2). You Feel Angry Around Them

3). You Don’t Want To Go See Them

4). You Find Yourself Having To Take Care Of Them

5). You Feel Drained Around Them

6). You Feel Numb Around Them

7). You Can’t Say Anything Right Around Them

8). You Feel Forced To Be Around Them

9). You Feel Unlike Yourself Around Them

10). You Feel Like They Control The Relationship

Unlike healthy relationships, which have highs and lows, and struggles now and then, a toxic relationship is poison to the people involved. The excuse of “being blood” or “being family” is no excuse. Families should be safe havens for the people within them, a shelter of love, hope, support, and affection in a vast world.

** BENEFITS OF LOW OR NO CONTACT? **

Aside from no longer putting yourself in the path of constant maltreatment, you will likely enjoy:

~~ A sense of peace (all the jitters of constantly expecting an emotional ambush will be gone.)
~~ A sense of empowerment (for the first time, you may be protecting yourself.)
~~ A sense of being a real grown-up (no longer having your life dictated by anyone else (ie: toxic parents)
~~ Freedom (to make your own choices)
~~ Holidays you can enjoy (without the drama, the demands, the painful interactions)
~~ A sense of being more authentically “you”
~~ A better use of time (in doing what you want)
~~ Growing more comfortable in your skin
~~ Discovering new facets of your personality which were buried under the toxicity.
~~ New fulfilling relationships with emotionally healthy people
~~ Joy in being untethered (emotionally)
~~ A voice that speaks the truth
~~ A voice that says what you don’t like, what you do, what hurts you, what gives you joy—all without fear of repercussions
~~ A better view of the world (and less feeling like the world is going to ambush you with its demands, pains, and abuse)

Some of these benefits will come immediately from putting a halt to the toxic relationships while other benefits, such as finding one’s voice and living without a notion of guilt, may take time and even therapy…

People who come out of deeply toxic relationships often have a form of PTSD, so the movement from feeling run over and emotionally exhausted to feeling happy can take time, patience, and support. Be sure not to rush it and to nuture yourself.

BOTTOM LINE? Choose You. Choose Happiness and Peace. Choose Your Emotional Well-Being.

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Post by Ms. Mozelle Martin

Aiding & Abetting: Don’t Do It !

“Aiding & Abetting” was a huge issue that nearly tore our family apart even though it only went on for one month.

THANK GOD it’s been over for a very long time but I worked arm-in-arm with probation to bring that person to justice. Albeit not my family member who was the “runner”, it involved someone very close to me who I was trying to help educate so he would protect himself and his marriage. However, it was very frustrating for me because the person who was committing “A & A” would not listen to me when I tried to issue warnings and show proof, even though I have hung around law enforcement as my career for over 30 years. Ho-hum… you can lead a horse to water but you cannot make them drink. Plus “ignorance of the law” is NO excuse and holds ZERO power in the court system.

So I am sharing this information to help others avoid issues and also because “Aiding & Abetting” is a HUGE indicator of co-dependency.

Maybe YOU will know someone who needs (& may actually listen to)  this advice…

  • NEVER, EVER put your freedom on the line for someone running from the police, NO MATTER how much you LOVE the “runner”. Oftentimes, the BEST love is “tough love”.
  • NEVER be more invested in someone’s life than they are.

Now… WHAT IS A&A?

Aiding & Abetting (A&A) is an act that is committed while helping a person run from the law or helping protect or hide someone who is currently in the process of committing a crime. Although this should be obvious… “YES, running from the law IS a crime!”

In fact, YOU could be charged with aiding and abetting (& more) if you have knowledge of, or have *unknowingly* participated in, the crime in some way before and / or after the actual crime occurred… even if you did not know that specific person at the time of the crime… and even years after it was committed.

Keep in mind that if you KNOW someone is a “runner” and has a warrant, this is a choice THEY are making while YOU choose to put your freedom on the line.

HOW? Because “knowledge of a crime and not reporting it is also a crime in and of itself” (a crime that YOU are choosing to commit). So if you know someone is running from the law, do NOT help them!

HOW DO YOU COMMIT A&A?

Most of the time it is done *innocently* such as:

  • giving that individual money,
  • providing a hotel room for one or several nights,
  • car rides (yes, even if paying for Uber, Lyft, or a cab),
  • buying them a plane or bus ticket,
  • providing a couch to sleep on (even for a few hours), etc.

AIDING+AND+ABETTING+Aiding+and+abetting+is+a+theory+of+criminal+liability.Basically ANYthing that continues to help them “get by” or “survive on the streets” while they CHOOSE to continue eluding the law! In other words, they are busy making terrible choices and now have gotten YOU involved. Not only is them asking you to help unfair to you but… YOU CAN GET ARRESTED TOO. They know this but they do NOT care about you (only themselves) otherwise, they would not have asked you for help at all!!

Depending upon the state’s laws, penalties for “Aiding and Abetting” can include:

  • felony charges (criminal record),
  • up to LIFE in prison,
  • community service,
  • driver’s license suspension,
  • VERY large fines $$$$$,
  • loss of future employment & education opportunities,
  • loss of current job and / or occupational license,
  • loss of voting rights,
  • loss of gun-carrying rights,
  • probation, etc.
  • and you may lose your marriage and never see your children / grandchildren again.

Keep in mind, if it’s in multiple states YOU can face the same harsh penalties including multiple criminal / felony charges in ALL states (ie: aiding & abetting, harboring a fugitive, interfering with an investigation, etc.)

NOBODY’s – I repeat – NOBODY’S bad choices are worth YOU losing your life or freedom for. The VERY BEST thing you can do is have NO contact with the “runner” at all, and NEVER lie to the police (which can add even more charges). The 2nd BEST thing you can do when the “runner” contacts you is say, “I love you but I cannot help you. You need to turn yourself in” OR if they call and insist that you pick them up, say “yes” but do NOT pick them up. I realize this is deceptive but ultimately you will be doing them a favor! So instead of picking them up, immediately call the police / probation officer and give them the “runners” location. DOCUMENT EVERYTHING (audio is even better and there are free apps such as this one) because that documentation could keep you out of jail!

That’s not all… getting arrested would be minor compared to what could happen to you such as:

  • YOU COULD GET KILLED by police if they catch you with the “runner” and the “runner” is uncooperative… just by getting caught in the cross-fire.
  • YOU COULD GET KILLED by non-police if your “runner” has some enemies (and most likely does), and *they* find him first.

Bottom line is… do NOT take chances.

Finally, you should already know this but let me remind you anyway… often, the BEST help is absolutely NONE at all.

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Post by Ms. Mozelle Martin

 

Is Handwriting Analysis a Psychic Tool?

Good question! You will find the answer somewhere in the below compilation, including answers to questions about a murder-suicide, online dating, and if handwriting analysis is a psychic tool.

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Post by Ms. Mozelle Martin